Comparing Relationships

Late night two Thursdays, I was chatting with my friend KK on YM about his new guy. I haven't seen this guy yet so I asked him to send pictures. Instead, he invited me to view his webcam. So I did. And wow, his guy looked really hot on cam. I was actually a bit envious. And then he also showed me a his boy's cousin on cam, who turns out to be gay too. He was also cute! And then my friend invited me out to Malate and I said I couldn't because I have plans with Jake and we don't really go to Malate.

I passed by Jake's apartment after my shift but he was already sleeping and he didn't seem to keen on going out anymore. I felt somewhat annoyed but I understood him. So I decided to just go out with KK and his guy and his guy's cousin.

Halfway to Malate, I felt like turning back. What am I going there for? I was afraid that I'm going there because I wanna meet his guy's cousin. And I was also feeling like I wanted to see his guy so that I can compare.

***

Last night, my friend Casey called for a meetup. She's breaking up with her boyfriend of 3 years - for the fourth time. For the first three breakups, I'm the staunchest supporter of her breaking up with him. Now, it's the case of the boy who cried wolf; or rather, the girl who cried breakup.

One of the many reasons why she's breaking up with him is because she doesn't feel like their relationship is happy. And her boyfriend's reaction to that was that she only feels that way because she's comparing their relationship with other couples.

***

I've also read in a Cosmopolitan Philippines magazine article that it's not healthy to compare your relationship with those of other couples. But I disagree. I think it gives you a level of self-awareness when it comes to your relationship with the one you love. Also, it also shows you what you want. Now, if what you want is the guy in the other relationship, then that's a problem. But if it's just a matter of being sweeter to each other or being for fun as a couple, then I think it's healthy.

***

And so I arrived in Malate and finally met the new "it" couple. And it turns out that we're still as "it" as they are. Haha. His guy is cute, but he photographs better, unlike KK who is not photogenic but looks really good in person. But his cousin is a relevation. He also looks better in person. But not civilized enough to earn my admiration or my infatuation. I think my last three sentences rhymed!

I decided not to linger any longer because I'm not really enjoying the rowdy crowd. And I felt like I didn't want to be here anyway if Jake wasn't around. It's not as fun.